I know what punters go through…

September 28th, 2010 by DiQld

I am in Melbourne with a friend, we have just been out to dinner and we are very happy and merry (almost drunk) and it is about 1am.
We start to play (yes he knows what I do) and he says
“lets get a hooker in!”
” yep ok, but I don’t want a young stiff girl! I want a woman that will enjoy it too – someone like me! lets have a look on the net – I have a fair idea where to look – review sites!)
” nah we will use the phone book – quicker!” So he starts looking… he gives me a number and I dial and speak to a sexy sounding lady on the phone and after I explain what we are after she says “I have just the lady , but she is about 1.5 hrs away though” and we agree that is fine…

Whilst waiting for our fun to arrive and turned on by the anticipation of her arrival, we decided to play (well we had to stay awake!) and in the heat of the moment I tear off my tights and rip the legs apart and use one of the legs to tie his hands together … this causes an instant hard on (he loves this side of me) with the other leg I tie it around his cock and balls to keep him rock hard whilst we wait and we play!

His cock was the hardest I have ever seen it, and he told me he had fantasised abut fucking a woman whilst she was eating out that sweet pussy of mine.. I told him he should get down on his knees and eat me so that I would be all juicy for whore that was coming… this was so hot I loved it as much as he did!

Then the door buzzer went well I don’t know who was more excited! I threw on a tee-shirt (which barely covered anything) and went downstairs to get her!

I was very nervous as I turned to see her standing at the glass door! Then the full picture hit me! OMG!
There she was standing there in her red blue and white mini dress with her boobs almost exploding from the top of the dress, her mouth painted red, She smiles… I get a childhood flash back – of Ernie Bloody Sigley! Yep she has a gap in her front teeth that you can park a bike in! but it is not that which is holding my attention…

It is the white fedora hat that is perched on her head that holds my gaze and the single shuddering thought that runs through my mind at that moment is ‘Why do most hookers look cheap and nasty? Is this something they try to do? Or does it come naturally?’ Then as I get closer I see the shoes… very white very high… Yuck! This is getting worse! As I draw closer to the door I can now see her face and I am shocked! She must be nearly 50! Maybe even 60! OMG I will be a granny fucker! It is at this point I consider running upstairs and saying I can’t I just can’t! But I have a guy up there that wants to see and experience this! And a lady that has come out to see us! so I decide to put my working cap on be an adult and open the door… she says hello and her voice is as great as the rest of her! Scratchy and hard! I walk up the stairs first that way I can adjust to what I am about to do (not like at home where I do it to tease) and she follows… I am still contemplating running inside and shutting the door to leave her out in the hall… but a little self talk (you have had worse men Di! get a grip bitch! You don’t have to kiss her! And we don’t have to eat her!) and we are inside and I have paid her… (more incentive to keep her) But I can’t loose the thought… God I do hope that guys don’t think like this when they see me! Yep the dreaded self doubt is creeping in! The questions that were running through my head were incredible.. Would this??? could this??? be me??? In ten years??? Was she clean? When was her last health check? Do they have them in Melb? God what will I do if she tries to kiss me? What is she expecting? ENOUGH I finally think!

I have handed this lady $500 for an hour of her valuable play time and I have a man tied up rock hard in the other room hot and horny! Lets go get him I thought!

So I point to where my trussed up man (Sam) is and she goes first (I want to see his face when he sees her – I know… I know… I am a bitch) His face was about the same as mine when I first saw her at the door! So maybe not I am not that much of a bitch or he is a prick too! Thank god I never see that face when I look at a client!

She was surprised and a bit wary when she saw that he was tied up! And now that I think about it I would have been too! But he was naked lying there at full mast! God that was hot!

She took off her shoes and I noticed her feet were crooked! Bunions! OMG she has bunions! she must be old! ( I am wondering whether you guys go through this thought process?) then she took of the hat.. Thin hair…. OMG I don’t believe I am doing this! No way… I was not going to eat this lady out! So as she took off her dress she did have nice underwear on (thank god) I sat on the bed next to Sam and watched her get out the tools of the trade! Condoms and Lube, I kissed him and said OMG and we both started to laugh! I take the condom and say here let me as I place the condom on his cock (more because I wanted to shield the cock I loved from her mouth and body) and she starts to suck his cock, I go to the other side and gently lick his balls – he moans in pleasure… I tell her I want to see his cock disappear into her pussy and she rolls off her knees and parts her legs open and opens her pussy – saying she has a very meaty pussy with big lips and that guys love that about her as she pulls them apart… and that her boobs were natural – all very matter of fact as tho it is normal conversation! not sure I could be so open and declarative in my daily work! But I can see the fascination!

Then she said the funniest thing and I am not sure she realised how it sounded… I asked her to fuck him and she said….
” Well you will have to get up and fuck me babe, cause your cock will get harder if you are doing the pushing, I find it goes a bit limper if I am on top and you are not the driving force! You understand? It will be better for both of us!”
I looked at Sam! He looked at me! We both looked at his cock – which looked like it was about to explode! And I said
“I have never had that happen to me yet and nah it is tied no way that is going limp! And as we are paying ( I know I am a bitch – value for money is what I give and it is what I expect!) he gets to lay there whilst you ride him and I watch…. You get to do the work”
Well she again tried
“it will be harder if he works it and I love a hard cock… Knowing she wanted to relax and be lazy I looked at her and simply said
“I have never had that problem!” She desisted and got on… Well the noises.. Like a bad porn movie! – “Yes babe put that cock into that wet juicy pussy! Let me ride your cock! Ohhh Baby you are a big boy aren’t you! Etc… At one stage I was behind her playing with her squarish boobs ( yep wasn’t sure what was going on there! But I asked later and I will tell you what she said – read on) from behind… so here we have this older lady riding Sam’s rock hard cock… and me watching her pussy sliding up and down on her cock.. It looked good till her back caught my eye… She had scars, and because of a combination of her age and thinness – this nobbly thing (bone?) near her tailbone… Well I was mesmerised (yet again) and then there was the thin skin (sign of age)

I can’t imagine what Sam was thinking as she was riding his cock with her face hanging over his! I was way to scared make eye contact with him cause every time I did that our eyes grew wide and we gave a little shudder and thought how funny this was! I mean he was here to have a good time… me laughing would not do that!

At one stage I though Sam was horrified but I think it was my facial expression he was mirroring back at me! Sam then asked if he could get up and fuck her whilst she licked me out.. Hmmm I said that sounds nice! So he stood (and he was no harder) and fucked her whilst she dined at the Y – she was definitely not enjoying her job! Cause she was not very good at it! But I did enjoy watching Sam getting off on the visuals…

Sam and I had exchanged many looks during the night and I was sure there were more to come… and then it hit me….

this was the funniest thing I had ever done in my life!

Here I was getting munched on by a hooker that I would have run from at any other time, thinking about how hard Sam’s cock was and how I couldn’t wait to get rid of her to have it to myself and he was fucking her and she was moaning and oohhhing and arrrhhing whilst eating me and here I was laying there – all I could think of was how thin her hair was and what her true age was! Well finally I couldn’t hold my laughter in anymore… half disguised as me coming and half as drunk female being naughty laughter I pretended to come ( yep although I don’t do it and hate doing it – sometimes you just have too!) and I know that Sam knew I hadn’t come but she seemed happy with herself when I squeezed out from under her.. And laid back whilst Sam came and we finished up! She was happy! He had cum, I was still stifling the cringe!

So she had a wash in the sink (yep not even a shower) and left Sam sitting there hands tied and cock tied and a condom full of cum hanging off his still hard cock! I took the condom off and sealed and disposed of it. Untied his cock and hands and chatted to her whilst Sam went to the other bathroom to have a twinkle.

I asked if she had had a busy night and cringed when she said
” yes she had been busy all night and was heading to her next job now and then 1 more!” (not sure how I got my jaw closed to ask the next question) Not sure I wanted to hear that! She returned to the bed to sit and put her clothes on.

I Had to ask this didn’t I? Oh yeah I did!
So I asked
“So are your boobs natural or have you had them enhanced?”
“No completely natural”, she says,
“oh ok they look enhanced”, I say
“no I have enlarged Milk ducts and they (I started to cringe as I guessed what she was going to say next) even ooze milk!”
I don’t think Sam could believe what she just said so as a demonstration she squeezed a nipple and sure enough thick white fluid emerged! I now knew I needed to get her out of there so that I could cringe as I needed to… You know that little uncontrollable shake you get and can’t control when something is just too awful! Then I asked her for her card! Her face lit up when I asked not only for the agency card but for hers as well… She then said… I am Jazzy with the Hat if you can’t remember anything else just ask for the GIRL in the hat… and with that I ushered her out!

So what did I learn…

What clients (punters) must go through every time they organise a girl through an agency (sight unseen)
The excitement that gees you up to accept what ever appears on the doorstep!
That I would have to be comatose to agree to that again!
To have a shower after every client! A wash is just not good enough!
Never tell a client that you have another client unless you know it turns them on!
That I really have to meet some hookers that I could work with in other states!
That I never want to dress or act as a cheap slutty hooker!
That I do not want to be doing this in ten years time!
That I give a bloody good service! And am worth more!
Fat is Better than Skinny!
A Young hooker is better than an Old Hooker!